Wednesday, May 09, 2007
After school, i was down n feeling pretty useless about myself, but i shoved off the unwanted feeling and continued to be normal. nevertheless, as soon as i got home, the feeling drifted back...
this is gonna be really emotional, i guess if you don't want to read on, then its okay...
i am having difficulty with the lectures and tutorials. i don't seem to get a lot of things, where others could just get it into their heads once the teacher taught. i guess i'm really slow. i find it hard to absorb the things taught, and i was just wondering, am i just plain stupid? especially in IT lessons, there are a number of times when i can't catch up with the tutor. i was so confused and lost. it was at those kind of moments where i feel so bad about myself. i find it hard to ask my friends, cause i'm afraid of disturbing their work. i'm really trying hard to be independent, but i just can't seem to be able to. i am so.. tired..
When i think of statistics and FOM, i just feel so stressed. i don't understand what the statistics lecturer is talking about, n my FOM just sucks. i'm just so not a creative person.. For the presentation just now, i really tried hard to talk louder so that the teacher could catch what i was talking about. i was practically shouting? but he can't seem to hear clearly. kay, i'm sorry for writing these sad things out. i just wanna get it out of my chest. sorry if i spoiled your mood.
Am just wondering, why do time pass so quickly? its gonna be exams soon. n im still blur about my modules.
After pouring these things out, i'm feeling a whole lot better now. i guess i just need to rest first. Now when i think of it, i need to get back on my tracks. i don't know why but i suddenly feel like crying. i'm so sorry. Ya, and i will get back on my tracks. soon! I know that Jesus will guide me. ((:
once again, i'm so sorry for saying such sad things out. sorry.
i'm glad i have great frens! thanks for being with me, i know u all helped me lots. when i don't understand, u guys will try to help mi out. im sorry for bothering you all. i'm really glad to have u guys as my frens! i thank God for letting me know u ppl.! thanks to all my frens! thanks a lot. and i know i need u guys a lot. thanks! words can't express my gratitude..
nowadays hav been having late nights cause of projects. i guess all of us are tired. i wanna have a nice rest today, and be happy again tomorrow! waha, yay! finally, a nice sleep's waiting for me! keke, i actually had bloodshot eyes ytd nite. man, it was scary. glad it went away. ((:
n ya, my hp's officially spoiled! its the first time it spoiled! lol. i received a msg ytd morning, n was punching the buttons to view the message. and nothing happened! nothing at all! my goodness! i was saying, " don't do this to me! please recover arr!" nothing happened of coz. haha. and so it goes...! it felt really strange to be without a hp ya, really strange. haha. n i've got great news! mum offered to lend me her hp! i placed my sim card into her hp., so its the same number. just that the phonebk is hers. so i wont know who msged or called me! i guess i'll save the numbers as time goes. lol. thanks mum! love my mum!
kay i guess that's it. wanna have my dinner! byiiee!
takkire all. xD
* my S H A T T E R E D dreams_
7:30 PM
